Passive Collapse: A poem

There was a foot,
The cutest little foot,
The weakest little foot,
That you ever did see.
Now, the foot’s on the ground,
And the ground tugs the foot,
And the green grass grows all around, all around, and the green grass grows all around.

 

And on that foot,
There was a shin,
The cutest little shin,
That you ever did see.
And the shin’s on the foot,
And the foot’s on the ground,
And the ground tugs the foot,
And the green grass grows all around, all around and the green grass grows all around.

And on that shin,
There was a thigh,
The cutest little thigh,
That you ever did see.
And the thigh’s on the shin,
And the shin’s on the foot,
And the foot’s on the ground,
And the ground tugs the foot,
And the green grass grows all around, all around and the green grass grows all around.

And on that thigh, (and on that thigh)
There was a pulley, (there was a pulley)
The cutest little pulley, (all those hip muscles)
That you never did use, (cuz your chair makes you weak)
So the thigh rotates in,
takes the top of the shin
while the bottom of the shin,
slides and mucks up the ankle,
Cuz the foot’s on the ground,
And the ground-foot makes traction,
And the green grass grows all around, all around and the green grass grows all around.

So now your joints, (you knees, hips, ankles),
Are all off kilter (on three main planes),
As you walk, run, dance (as you move through life),
So listen to me (yes, listen to me):
Line your foot up straight,
Twist your thighs to neutral,
Pick up the arch and ankle,
Load the knee more centrally,
Put the side of the foot,
Where it goes (on the bottom)
Don’t depend on shoes,
To keep your foot from collapsing,
Find your lateral hips,
and use them walking.
And the green grass grows all around, all around and the green grass grows all around.

Today's takeaways are:

1. Weakness in the hip affects more than the hip.

2. Weakness in the foot affects more than the foot and ankle.

3. Your body can change positions without requiring an internal force. Joints and bones can change orientations passively through interactions between your strength/weakness patterns and external forces like gravity and, in this case, traction.

4. Read this book:

Find Simple Steps to Foot Pain Relief in our shop!

 

5. Watch this video:

(Did you like that ending? Can you say "Fatigue?"

6. I need to coin the term FOOT SCHMEAR. And all of the other common-yet-unnamed passive skeletal deformations that don't conform to the simplified movement lists handed out in anatomy courses.

7. I don't have time to talk about the medial moments created at the knee and the inappropriate joint loading there, but you get it already. Right?

Got Schmear? If you've got a lot of foot mass on the sides of your feet, it's probably the what's-supposed-to-be-the- bottom of your foot you're looking at, schmeared via your gait pattern. The solution: Counter-schmear, of course. Which you can create through external rotation (hip strengthening) done with your feet on the ground.